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8.17.2010

Stealth Meter

It is universally acknowledged that the killing of a fly requires a supreme amount of stealthiness. Since I frankly have nothing better to do, I watched my family over a week to see how stealthy they are.

Mom's reaction: Not much. Waved fly away into window. Fly flew back. Wave. Flies back. Calls Dad to get it.
Stealth Meter: 1.

Dad: Develops determined look. Primal hunting instincts are unearthed. Grabs newspaper. Wears invisible cape. Fly has no way out, gives in and is murdered. Dad develops cackle and pronounces himself (with funny accent) "Bug Kill-ler!".
Stealth Meter:9

Grandpa: Speaks to fly in Chinese. Fly is intrigued, Grandpa goes all Jackie Chan on the fly. Fly is humiliated. Dies.
Stealth Meter:10

Grandma: Doesn't notice fly.
Stealth Meter: Uhm.

Me: Pronounces self stealthiest of all. Develops Russian mafia accent. ( Vokay, you fly vinto vindow, no vone hurt. Mafia no kill. Mafia pay big money.) Locks fly in window. Fly doesn't die, no vone hurt. Mafia pay big money.
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5 comments:

  1. Olivia SalomonAugust 17, 2010 at 8:41 PM

    I like you Grandpa's and your dad's methods best- though yours is very amazing, the fly does not die. Not that I am pro-murder, but whatever. You did not fill requirements of stealth. KILL THE FLY!!!! Jk.

    ReplyDelete
  2. jessieAugust 18, 2010 at 2:53 PM

    MAFIA PAY BIG MONEY THOUGH

    ReplyDelete
  3. BrieAugust 23, 2010 at 10:31 PM

    LOL.... I like jessies the best especialy the accent

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ellie G.August 27, 2010 at 3:38 PM

    haha your grandpa sounds like an interesting person, I'd like to meet him.

    ReplyDelete
  5. jessieSeptember 1, 2010 at 11:22 AM

    I think he would like you a lot.

    ReplyDelete

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